Client lunches

I’m no faker or a fraud. I achieve things through hard work and determination; and my confidence and skills at persuasion are invaluable assets along the way. I’ve got a long way to go but I always did and continue to study hard, when required, and even now I am enrolling in a Masters Degree. You can’t sit still in this business, to challenge the best you have to be the best; and you don’t do that by sitting on you backside. I do everything by the book, as all good business people should. No inheritance from Daddy for me, no family members in positions of power, I got myself where I am and will get myself where I want to be on my own, and I like it that way. I get a little help along the way though my extensive network, but again, it’s my network that I built.

I no longer have the desire to interrogate Jono so I walk to his desk to give him the brush off. He’s not there, which is a shame as that would have been very satisfying. My assistant Sarah taps me on the shoulder and asks me to sign off her expenses, which are mostly things I have asked her to buy me like sushi, coffee and expensive staplers. Sarah has worked with me for a couple months now and ticks all the boxes required of a successful assistant. Young, but not too young; good-looking but not too good-looking and smart but not too smart. She’s spunky and we often flirt innocently, innocently from my side anyway. With a raised eyebrow she comments, “Look at all this coffee, you’ll get fat you know and we can’t have that can we.” Considering I use a personal trainer three times a week and run on the beach every second day, I find that unlikely, regardless, I make a mental note to check how fatty skim milk is. Unusually, I can’t think of a witty response so I just smile and show my recently whitened teeth, which does the job of making her giggle.

The talk of food reminds me that I have a client lunch today. I love client lunches, mainly because they usually turn into something resembling the night-out in The Hangover, excluding the rohypnol of course. I’ve wined and dined at some of this country’s finest establishments and today I’m taking Pete Dunstan to Quay to squeeze a six-figure sum out of him. Pete drinks like a thirsty fish and knowing how our lunches normally pan out we’ll talk business for about ten minutes, eat about ten mouthfuls and drink for ten hours. Unfortunately, this afternoon I have my meeting with Brian, meaning I have to either cancel lunch or stay off the booze, neither of which will make Pete a happy chappy. I’ll have to remind Sarah once again that when I have an important afternoon meeting, I cannot have a client lunch. And if I do have a lunch, my diary should always be cleared out for the rest of the day, and until 10am the following day. The last lunch Pete Dunstan and I had, about six months ago, consisted of alcohol, lap dancing, business, a meal and Pete losing his suit in a bet. In that order. Pete has the physique of a sumo wrestler on his holidays so being half naked on Martin Place didn’t do Tourism Australia any favours.